Autocorrect

If you’ve tried to type something into a computer or a phone lately, you may have noticed that these gizmos come with auto correct, a wonderful invention that has almost done away with our spelling mistakes but created a whole list of new problems. Just ask the guy who sent his friend a message, “I sold my Grandma for $2000.”  The friend replied, “You sold your grandma?” He meant he had sold his Grand Am car. Ah, auto correct. Here are a few other mistakes generated by these little time saving devices.

“How long can boneless children last in the freezer? Oh my goodness. I meant Chicken.”

“Do you know if you are having a boy or a girl?”

“I don’t know. Just as long as it’s healthy and it has ten fingers and ten Tostitos.”

“Ten Tostitos? You want your baby to come out bearing chips?”

The expectant mother replied. Yes! And it better not forget the dip. I’m gonna be hungry.”

Here’s another: “Just watched the news. Weatherman says to prepare for flamingos this weekend.”

“Oh no!” responded the friend. “Anything but flamingos!”

“What? Flamingos? I meant flooding.”

Someone confessed, “The whole office is complaining because I have tuna in my underwear.”

“I can’t say I blame them,” said their friend.

“Whoops!” he replied, “I meant tuna in my Tupperware.”

It’s beginning to look like some of us need an auto-correct function to correct the auto-correct.

And I can’t help but think to myself, “Wouldn’t it be nice to have an auto-correct in life? Not one that changes flooding to flamingos and toes to tostitos, but one that fixes our mistakes before we even make them. You see, I’ve said things I’d like to take back. Rephrase. Blot out. Unkind things. Graceless things. Things I wish could have been softened or muted or deleted altogether. I need forgiveness just like the wife who texted her husband on his birthday, “Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday dead husband, happy birthday to you.” Her hubby responded, “Thanks. I assume you meant, ‘Dear.’” And of course she did.  Few things bring the laughter back as quickly as the offering of forgiveness. A million quarrels have been stopped dead in their tracks by it. Forgiveness is a wonderful idea. Until we have to practice it. Yet it’s impossible to experience true joy unless we look past the mistakes of others and say, “I forgive you.” It is the one true auto-correct, grace can set things right when they’re dreadfully wrong.

We can forgive the inexcusable because God has done the same for us. Micah 7:19 says that God will trample our sins under His feet and throw them into the depths of the sea. So go ahead. Bring back the joy. Forgive someone today.

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Phil Callaway

Phil Callaway, the host of Laugh Again, is an award-winning author and speaker, known worldwide for his humorous yet perceptive look at life.

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