Left-Handed Whoppers


A little boy was at the park with his mother. Trees swayed in a gentle breeze. Swans paddled gracefully across a pond. “You know Bobby,” said his mom, “God painted this beautiful scenery just for you.” Bobby responded, “Yes, and He painted it with His left hand.” “What makes you say that?” asked his mother. “Well,” said Bobby, “we learned at Sunday School that Jesus sits on God’s right hand.” Ah, kids.


I guess I can tell left-handed jokes because I’m a lefty, and it has its benefits. They say lefties are creative and intelligent and better at multi-tasking than our right-handed counterparts. Lefties make great artists and writers and a surprisingly high percentage of comedians. Sadly, our society wasn’t designed for lefties.


Back on April 1, 1998, Burger King placed an ad in USA Today announcing a new menu item: the Left-Handed Whopper. All the condiments were rotated 180° to suit the left-handed burger connoisseur. It was an April Fool’s Day hoax, of course, but thousands of excited lefties showed up at Burger King restaurants to request the Left-Handed Whopper. So much for us lefties being extra bright!


The truth is, most of the stuff you can buy just wasn’t designed for us. We need left-handed scissors. We have to use appliances and tools backwards. And if you find something that’s designed for lefties, it costs extra – like buying gluten-free bread. If that isn’t bad enough, we get ink on our hands when we write. We bonk elbows with righties at the table. We’re more likely to have allergies. More prone to be insomniacs. According to one study, on average, lefties don’t live as long as righties. When I heard this, I thought, maybe this world wasn’t designed for people like me. Or perhaps I wasn’t designed for this world.


There’s something awkward about existence on planet earth, isn’t there? Things fall apart, people disappoint, jobs end, loved ones pass away. And something inside of us hollers, “Hey! It shouldn’t be this way.” And we’re right. Sin came into this world and messed things up. Along came pain, death and right-handed scissors. Maybe that’s why I smile whenever I read Hebrews 13: “For this world is not our permanent home; we are looking forward to a home yet to come. Therefore, let us offer through Jesus a continual sacrifice of praise to God….do not forget to do good to others.” Those who care most about the coming home make the biggest difference in this one. So let’s set our eyes on the God who is making all things new and live with joy today.


C.S. Lewis once wrote, “If we find ourselves with a desire that nothing in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that we were made for another world.” I think he was right, don’t you? Or…maybe he was left.

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