I’m told that the most common shoplifted food item is cheese. Shoplifting is never a gouda idea, but when a truck driver had his truck serviced deep in Cheesehead country, Wisconsin, a crook decided to cheese the day, swiping all 20,000 pounds of cheese from the trailer. Where would you store that much cheese?

But cheese is small potatoes. How about stealing an entire lawn? In Calgary, Alberta, a woman returned home to discover that her pristine lawn was now a pile of dirt. Well, we’ve got the dirt on this thief. He was a landscaper with the wrong address. I hope he got a new GPS.

Not to be outdone, crooks in the Czech Republic made off with a 10-ton bridge. These metal scrappers forged documents and informed authorities in the village of Slavkov that a cycle route was coming through. The bridge—worth about $6,000 as scrap metal—has not been recovered.

The greatest heist in history involved no cheese, lawns or bridges, but an empty tomb.

Following the death of Jesus, some who had guarded His grave were offered money to claim the disciples staged an elaborate heist like those Czech metal scrappers, stole Christ’s body, then said He had risen from the dead. But their story never gained any traction.

Why? First, what were the disciples’ motives? Like their fellow Jews, they expected the Messiah to usher in an unending political kingdom. His death was the last thing they expected.

Second, can you imagine a tax collector, some fishermen, and a few common yokels overpowering or sneaking past highly trained soldiers? Picture it. “Hey guys, keep real quiet. The guards are asleep. Don’t they know they’ll be badly beaten or killed for nodding off? Now, let’s just break this Roman seal, and carry the body away before they wake up. Uh oh, there’s a really big stone here. But let’s give it a shot. Everyone on the count of three. One…two…” This entire scenario seems absurd.

And thirdly, remember that liars make very lousy martyrs. If they knew their message was bogus, why would they willingly endure imprisonment, persecution, and death? No one dies for something he knows to be a lie.

I believe there is no other plausible explanation. Jesus Christ is risen. What have we to fear when the ultimate grave robber has been here, conquering death and offering forgiveness and eternal life to all who believe in Him.

If you think Lara Croft is the ultimate tomb raider, think again.